I praise and crown
The girl in town
Who can tell us all
(We wait in thrall!)
The color of my favorite gown

איך באַלוין און באַקרוין
אַזאַ פּאַרשוין
װאָס קען שוין מיר
און דעם גאַנצן המון
טרעפֿן אָט אַזאַ קאָליר

I have seen
A certain color
Not like amber's sheen
Not like rubies' gleam
​But rather this color:

איך האָב אין זין
אַ מין קאָליר
ניט װי בורשטין
ניט װי רובין
​נאָר אַזאַ קאָליר

Don't you chatter!
Don't you burble!
You know what I'm after.

אײַנגעברענגט אַ גראָשן
אויסגעברענגט אַ קערבל
פֿאַרשטייסטו שוין מײַן לשון

Holy Creator!

You created Isaac our Father with a male body and a female soul.
​
You created Dinah, the daughter of Leah our Mother, as a male, but changed her sex
​while she was still in the womb.

And you created me.

Do I then, like Isaac,
​have a male body and a female soul?

Did you make me a girl
before turning me into a boy
​but forget to tell me about this change?

Help me, Creator of Isaac,
of Dinah, and of my humble self,
​to understand
​who, how, and why I am.

Science isn't enough.

 !הייליקער באַשעפער

האסט באשאפן יצחק אבינו
.מיט א מענלעכן גוף און א װײבלעכן זעל

האסט באשאפן דינה בת לאה אמינו
אלס א מאנסביל, און געטוישט איר מין
​אין דער שויס

און מיך האסטו אויך באשאפן

 האב איך דען, װי יצחק,
?​א מענלעכן גוף מיט א װײבלעכן זעל?
​​
האסט מיך באשאפן אלס א פרוי
פארן מיך פארװאנדלען אין א מאן
?נאר פארגעסן מיך דאס צו זאגן

העלף מיר, באשעפער פון יצחק
און דינה און אני הקטן,
​צו פארשטיין
.​װער, װי אזוי, און פארװאס איך בין

.דער װיסנשאפט איז ניט גענוג

​Once there was a book.
In the book, there was a page.
On the page, there was a word.
In the word, there was an o.
In the o, there was a hole.
The hole was a window.
Someone blocked it up.

אַ מאָל איז געװען אַ בוך
אין דעם בוך איז געװען אַ בלאַט
אַויפֿן בלאַט איז געװען אַ װאָרט
אינעם װאָרט איז געװען אַ ס
אינעם ס איז געװען אַ לאָך
דער לאָך איז געװען אַ פֿענצטער
מע האָט עס פֿאַרשטאָפּט

The stars are twinkling
I'm awake
I'm sitting and thinking
I'm awake

I look outside at the stars
Something inside of me stirs
My body wants to sleep
My limbs begin to slip

But the stars are twinkling
And I'm awake
I'm sitting and thinking
And I'm awake

And so? I write a poem.

 – ס'איז שפּעט בײַ נאַכט
.איך שלאָף ניט
 – איך זיץ און טראַכט
.איך שלאָף ניט

– קוק איך אַרויס דורכן פֿענצטער
.און אָט זע איך שוין װאָס ס'איז פֿינסטער
 – עס װילט זיך מײַן גוף שוין גיין שלאָפֿן
.איך גיי אים שוין טרעפּ־אַרויף שלעפּן

– און ס'איז שפּעט
.איך שלאָף ניט
– און איך זיץ אויף מײַן בעט
.איך שלאָף ניט

.איז אָט – איך שרײב א ליד

I want, I want
I want, I want it
But I'll never have it
I have never asked for it
​So no one knows I want it

איך װיל, איך װיל
איך װיל, איך װיל עס
נאָר איך גיי עס אַלץ ניט קריגן
װײַל איך האָב אויף דעם געשװיגן
​װייסט ניט קיינער אַז איך װיל עס

Dear G-d!

You made many, many slayers.

​I realize, of course, that it's no shame to be a slayer.
​
​
​But it's no great honor, either.

​So what would have been so terrible if I had been a Time Lord?


🎶🎶🎵

If I were a Time Lord
Daidle deedle daidle
Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum
(Cha cha! Cha!)

All day long I'd biddy-biddy-bum
If I were from Galafray.

I wouldn't have to kill vamps,
Daidle deedle daidle
Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum
(Cha cha! Cha!)

If I were a biddy-biddy Time
Wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey Lord

I'd build a big tall TARDIS,
Shiny and blue,
Right in the middle of the town,
A fine tin roof
With real wooden floors below.

There would be one long staircase
Up to the future
And one even longer to the past
And one more leading nowhere,
​just for show.

I'd fill my life with
​stars and planets and moons
And screwdrivers making funny sounds
Whirring just as noisily as they can

And each loud
"whir-whir-whir!"
"Fwoo fwoo fwoo!"
​"FANTASTIC!"
Would land like a trumpet on the ear
As if to say, "Hey Daleks, dudes, beware!"

Oy!

If I were a Time Lord
Daidle deedle daidle
Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum
(Cha cha! Cha!)

All day long I'd biddy-biddy-bum
If I were from Galafray.

I wouldn't have to kill vamps,
Daidle deedle daidle
Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum
(Cha cha! Cha!)

If I were a biddy-biddy Time
Wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey Lord

I see my husband, Angel,
Looking like a Time Lord's man
With a proper double heart,
Drinking love, not blood,
​To his hearts' delight.

I see him putting on airs
And strutting like a peacock,
Oy! What a happy mood he's in,
Screaming at the Big Bads day and night.

The most fantastic humanoids will
Come to fawn on me
They will ask me to advise them
Like a President of Earth,
"If you please, Time Lady?"
"Pardon me, Time Lady?"
Posing problems that would cross
Dear Giles's eyes

Ya va voy, ya va voy, voy vum

And it won't make one bit of difference
If I answer right or wrong
When you're immortal
​They think you really know.

If that were me,
​I'd have the time that I lack
To sit in the synagogue and pray,
And maybe even have a bat mitzvah, too.

And I'd discuss the learned books with
My chevruta, Willow,
Seven hours every day
That would be the sweetest thing of all

Oy!

If I were a Time Lord
Daidle deedle daidle
Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum
(Cha cha! Cha!)

All day long I'd biddy-biddy-bum
If I were from Galafray.

I wouldn't have to slay vamps,
Daidle deedle daidle
Daidle daidle deedle daidle dum

L-rd who made the slayer and the slayed
You decreed I should be what I am
Would it spoil some vast, eternal plan,
If I were from Galafray?!

Riboyni shel oylem!

​Host bashafn a velt mit fil vampirn-teyters!

Nu, farshteyt zikh, iz tsu zayn a vampirn-teyter nit keyn groyse bushe.

Dokh iz es oykhet nit keyn koved.

​Iz vos-zhe volt geven azoy shlekht, ven ikh bin a tsaytn-lord?


​🎶🎶🎵

Ven ikh bin a tsaytn-lord
Daydl didl daydl
Daydl daydl didl daydl dom
(Tsha-tsha! tsha!)

Tog un nakht – ay, bidi-bidi-bom!
Ven ikh bin fun Galefrey!

Ikh darf nit geyen teytn.
Daydl didl daydl
Daydl daydl didl daydl dom
(Tsha-tsha! Tsha!)

Ven ikh bin a bidi-bidi vues?
A vibli-vobli taymi-vaymi lord.

Un ze, ikh boy oyf a tardis –
​A tardis shebe'tardisim
Punkt inem tsenter fun mayn dorf
A fayner dakh
​Gemakht fun der tsayt aleyn

Es hot a groyse trep
Vos firt men tsum otid
A tsveyte firt men glaykh in over 'krik
A drite, oyf katoves,
​Keyn hotseplots!

Ikh fil mayn lebn on mit
​shterndlekh, planetn,
Mit zhumendike sonishe shroyfn-tsiyers
Vos royshn zikh vi bay dem sambatyon

Un yedn
"ver-ver-ver!"
"zhum-zhum-zhum!"
"FANTASTISH!"
A prakht, a freyd, an ekhte klang-gan-eydn
Borekh hashem shekacha lo baolamo!

Oy!

Ven ikh bin a tsaytn-lord
Daydl didl daydl
Daydl daydl didl daydl dom
(Tsha-tsha! tsha!)

Tog un nakht – ay, bidi-bidi-bom!
Ven ikh bin fun Galefrey!

Ikh darf nit geyen teytn.
Daydl didl daydl
Daydl daydl didl daydl dom
(Tsha-tsha! Tsha!)

Ven ikh bin a bidi-bidi vues?
A vibli-vobli taymi-vaymi lord.

Ikh ze mayn khosn, Eyndzhel,
An emesdiker tsaytn-lords man
Mit an ekhte topl-harts
Tantst er, zingt er,
Shikert zikh vi a ferd

Ikh ze, er blozt fun zikh,
Farrayst er di noz,
Oy, shep ikh nakhes on a mos!
Un er krigt zikh mer gornisht mit Spayk.

Di same shenste briyes
Lekn zikh tsu mir
Zaynen shoyel-eytse zikh mit mir
Vi ikh bin der prezident fun der erd
"Zayt mir moykhl, Tsaytn-Dame?"
"Entshulidkt mir, Tsaytn-Dame?"
Un afile Rupert Dzshaylz
Nemt mekane zayn.

Ya va voy, ya va voy, voy vum.

Un es makht nit keyn shum khilik
Tsi ikh entfer yo tsi neyn
Vayl zey geyn mikh loybn
Say-vi-say.

Ven dos bin ikh,
Hob ikh tsayt, oyf a novene,
Tsu zitsn in a shul un davenen,
Un efsher vern azh a bas-mitsve oykh.
​
Ikh lern gemora
Mit mayn Willow, mayn khevrusa,
Un oykhet shulken orekh un kabole
Dos vet zayn di greste zkhus fun alts!

Oy!

Ven ikh bin a tsaytn-lord
Daydl didl daydl
Daydl daydl didl daydl dom
(Tsha-tsha! tsha!)

Tog un nakht – ay, bidi-bidi-bom!
Ven ikh bin fun Galefrey!

Ikh darf nit geyen teytn.
Daydl didl daydl
Daydl daydl didl daydl dom

​Bashefer fun ale vampirn un fun teyters,
S'iz dayn viln, ikh zol zayn a teyter,
Dokh vet es kaliye makhn dayne plener
Ven ikh bin a Tsaytn-Lord?!

​I am
I am
Who am I?
I don't know.

I was
I was
Who was I?
I don't know.

I'll become
I'll become
Who will I become?
Nobody knows yet –
Least of all, me.

איך בין
איך בין
?װער דען בין איך
װייס איך ניט

איך בין געװען
איך בין געװען
?נאָר װער דען
.װייס איך ניט

איך גיי װערן
איך גיי װערן
?װער דען גיי איך װערן
קיינער װייסט נאָך ניט
.און איך – װייניקער פֿון אַלע

I click,
I click,
I click refresh,
And I cannot drag myself from this place:
Not from this chair,
Not from this website.

I click refresh.
I click refresh.

Refresh.
Refresh.
Refresh.
Refresh...

איך קװעטש
איך קװעטש
איך קװעטש רעפֿרעש
און שלעפּן שלעפּ איך זיך ניט פֿון אָרט
ניט פֿון דעם זיצאָרט
ניט פֿון דעם װעבאָרט

אַ קװעטש טאָן רעפֿרעש
אַ קװעטש טאָן רעפֿרעש
​
רעפֿרעש
רעפֿרעש
רעפֿרעש
רעפֿרעש